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KHR 370: A HANDSOME MAN APPEARS
I forgot to cross-post my last KHR review from tumblr. ...And the last, idk, five or six or possibly even ten before that. XD Whoops.
Anyway though, this week's review finally got long enough that it didn't feel awkward to cross-post it to DW and LJ as well. So I am just going to do that now! (For reference--my own, mostly--the previous tumblr reviews can be found if you scroll back a little ways through the KHR tag here.)
So hey, LJ and Dreamwidth actually have cuts! That sure is nice.
Somewhere, Hibari Kyoya is off fighting the Varia, sad and alone. And no one cares. …Well, no, I imagine people do actually care and some people are probably pissed off about it by this point, but. None of the other characters seem to care at any rate, so. XD I’M SORRY, HIBARI.
I have mixed feelings about this chapter. I thought for a little bit about why that is, and concluded that it’s probably because I actually read this chapter three times. First, and repeatedly, in my mind over the past week. Second, about three hours ago during the fifteen minutes I had between getting home from work, and running out to do other things. And lastly and most recently, about half an hour ago, during which I finally came to an epiphany of sorts.
Strangely enough, the chapter read very differently all three times! I shall now summarize for your enjoyment.
KHR 370, VERSION “IN MAKESTE’S MIND”
ADULT!REBORN: While it’s nice that everyone’s glad to see me, I’d appreciate it if the pants could all come back on now so we can get down to business.
TSUNA: OH MY GOD IT’S REBORN’S TRUE FORM! HE’S SO STRONG AND COOL AND DANGEROUS AND EVERYTHING A MAN SHOULD BE!
ADULT!REBORN: Damn straight. But more importantly—Iemitsu, you’re a dick and you tried to kill your son and my student and you’re a bad person and you should feel bad.
IEMITSU: Blah blah excuses blah blah let’s fight.
ADULT!REBORN: Blah blah lots of cool lines about taking fucking responsibility and being there for your son and maybe if you actually paid attention to him for once in your life you’d see that while he may be completely useless he’s not completely hopeless, I know because I am awesome and I’ve been his tutor and we have a fucking bond like you wouldn’t believe, man, isn’t that right, No-Good Tsuna?
TSUNA: *WIBBLY SHOUNEN AWE*
YAMAMOTO: *legs stop working on a tandem bike somewhere and angst ensues maybe, idk all right*
ADULT!REBORN: *punches Iemitsu in the balls*
IEMITSU: Reborn… you’re right… blah blah… lessons learned… Tsuna forgive me…
TSUNA: Blah blah heartfelt shounen speech of understanding!!! Dad you still suck but maybe this is a turning point in our relationship and from here on out we can turn a new leaf! And I’ll prove to you that I really am strong, damn it!
IEMITSU: I BELIEVE IN YOU… oh look, my watch is all broken, ain’t that a bitch.
ADULT!REBORN: My work here is done. *changes back to baby form*
SCENE: *CHANGES*
HIBARI: *FIGHTS*
CLIFFHANGER: *HAPPENS*
CHAPTER: *ENDS*
…Right.
And then, when I actually read the chapter…
KHR 370, VERSION “DISAPPOINTING REALITY”
ADULT!REBORN: *stands around, milkshake bringing all the boys to the yard*
TSUNA: YOU… YOU’RE… WHO ARE YOU.
LAL AND COLONNELLO: OH MY GOD TSUNA, YOU’RE RETARDED.
ADULT!REBORN: I’M NO ONE. I’M A STRANGER. DRAW YOUR OWN CONCLUSIONS.
ADULT!REBORN: Iemitsu you’re a dick imma fight you now. Tsuna, pay attention.
TSUNA: omg.
ADULT!REBORN: Tsuna, lesson one. You were wrong to think you’re better than your father, you suck at fighting, and your dad is a strong man who always gives his all for the sake of his family.
ADULT!REBORN: And lesson two, blah blah dying will means you have to be truly desperate and willing to risk it all or something idk whatever.
ADULT!REBORN: *SHOOTS IEMITSU ALL TO SHIT*
LAL: Holy shit, he targeted the CAROTID ARTERY PRECISELY! I think that means Iemitsu should be dead.
IEMITSU: *FALLS DOWN*
IEMITSU: *GETS UP. IS FINE*
ADULT!REBORN: My work here is done. *changes back to baby form*
TSUNA: REBORN WHERE WERE YOU. WHO WAS THAT MYSTERIOUS FEDORAED MAN. NEVERMIND, DOWN TO BUSINESS.
TSUNA: *blah blah fighting, kerpunched, zero point breakthrough*
CLIFFHANGER: *NOT REALLY FEELING IT?!*
CHAPTER: *ENDS*
CRUEL REALITY. CRUSHED EXPECTATIONS. SANTA CLAUS ISN’T REAL. STAR WARS PREQUELS MOSTLY SUCKED. THE NEW RADIOHEAD ALBUM WAS ONLY SO-SO. THAT COOL NEW THING YOU ORDERED FROM THINKGEEK WAS ONLY MILDLY ENTERTAINING FOR A DAY OR SO AND THEN YOU FORGOT ALL ABOUT IT.
Finally, I calmed down a little and came back to read the chapter with a fresh perspective.
KHR 370, VERSION “WELL ALL RIGHT, YOUR MIND ISN’T BLOWN AND YOUR PANTS ARE STILL ON, BUT IT’S REALLY NOT AS BAD AS YOU FIRST THOUGHT”
FIRST FOUR PAGES: *STILL KIND OF DISAPPOINTING BUT AT LEAST THERE ARE LULZ AND REBORN IS BEING A COMPLETE TROLL WHICH IS ADMITTEDLY ENTERTAINING*
ADULT!REBORN: Iemitsu, in all three versions of this chapter you are still a dick, just FYI. Now Tsuna, pay attention. I’m gonna throw some hard truths at you, but like it or not, this is stuff you will actually need to acknowledge if you’re going to beat your dad.
ADULT!REBORN: Number one, you can’t afford to be so self-righteous that you refuse to admit that you are not, in fact, as powerful or experienced as your father. If you underestimate him and rush in all cocky and arrogant you’re going to lose.
ADULT!REBORN: *KICKS TSUNA IN THE HEAD IN THE MIDDLE OF THIS EXPLANATION FOR NO APPARENT REASON*
ADULT!REBORN: And number two, vague hints about DYING WILL, hint hint, be willing to RISK IT ALL, hint hint hint. You’re my student and we have our special bond so I know you will understand my roundabout cryptic bullshit.
TSUNA: Astonishingly enough, I did understand it, or so it appears!
ADULT!REBORN: Yes, but before I get to that part, I’m going to shoot your dad in the carotid artery I guess, since it’s the next best thing to punching him in the balls.
REBORN: Okay, I’m done.
TSUNA: REBORN WHERE WERE YOU YOU APPEARED OUT OF NOWHERE THERE WAS A GUY IN A SUIT. ON THE SECOND READ-THROUGH MY FAILURE TO OBSERVE ALL THIS IS SOMEHOW LESS ANNOYING AND MORE HILARIOUS.
IEMITSU: Well, Tsuna, did you understand everything the mysterious FEDORA MAN told you?
TSUNA: ACTUALLY, YES. BECAUSE FEDORA MAN IS A MUCH BETTER TEACHER THAN YOU. ANYWAY, YOU’RE STILL A DICK AND I HAVE NO RESPECT FOR YOU BUT OK, FINE, YOU’RE STRONGER THAN ME.
FIGHTING: *HAPPENS*
IEMITSU: HE’S GOTTEN BETTER OMG. BUT—!
TSUNA: *KERPUNCHED* YOU’RE STRONG, FATHER, BUT… I WANT TO DEFEAT YOU!
TSUNA: *SHOUNEN DETERMINATION, ZERO POINT BREAKTHROUGH*
REBORN: Attaboy.
CHAPTER: *ENDS*
Having evaluated this chapter multiple times thus, I’m gonna go ahead and offer my final verdict:
…Not bad.
Anyway though, this week's review finally got long enough that it didn't feel awkward to cross-post it to DW and LJ as well. So I am just going to do that now! (For reference--my own, mostly--the previous tumblr reviews can be found if you scroll back a little ways through the KHR tag here.)
So hey, LJ and Dreamwidth actually have cuts! That sure is nice.
Somewhere, Hibari Kyoya is off fighting the Varia, sad and alone. And no one cares. …Well, no, I imagine people do actually care and some people are probably pissed off about it by this point, but. None of the other characters seem to care at any rate, so. XD I’M SORRY, HIBARI.
I have mixed feelings about this chapter. I thought for a little bit about why that is, and concluded that it’s probably because I actually read this chapter three times. First, and repeatedly, in my mind over the past week. Second, about three hours ago during the fifteen minutes I had between getting home from work, and running out to do other things. And lastly and most recently, about half an hour ago, during which I finally came to an epiphany of sorts.
Strangely enough, the chapter read very differently all three times! I shall now summarize for your enjoyment.
KHR 370, VERSION “IN MAKESTE’S MIND”
ADULT!REBORN: While it’s nice that everyone’s glad to see me, I’d appreciate it if the pants could all come back on now so we can get down to business.
TSUNA: OH MY GOD IT’S REBORN’S TRUE FORM! HE’S SO STRONG AND COOL AND DANGEROUS AND EVERYTHING A MAN SHOULD BE!
ADULT!REBORN: Damn straight. But more importantly—Iemitsu, you’re a dick and you tried to kill your son and my student and you’re a bad person and you should feel bad.
IEMITSU: Blah blah excuses blah blah let’s fight.
ADULT!REBORN: Blah blah lots of cool lines about taking fucking responsibility and being there for your son and maybe if you actually paid attention to him for once in your life you’d see that while he may be completely useless he’s not completely hopeless, I know because I am awesome and I’ve been his tutor and we have a fucking bond like you wouldn’t believe, man, isn’t that right, No-Good Tsuna?
TSUNA: *WIBBLY SHOUNEN AWE*
YAMAMOTO: *legs stop working on a tandem bike somewhere and angst ensues maybe, idk all right*
ADULT!REBORN: *punches Iemitsu in the balls*
IEMITSU: Reborn… you’re right… blah blah… lessons learned… Tsuna forgive me…
TSUNA: Blah blah heartfelt shounen speech of understanding!!! Dad you still suck but maybe this is a turning point in our relationship and from here on out we can turn a new leaf! And I’ll prove to you that I really am strong, damn it!
IEMITSU: I BELIEVE IN YOU… oh look, my watch is all broken, ain’t that a bitch.
ADULT!REBORN: My work here is done. *changes back to baby form*
SCENE: *CHANGES*
HIBARI: *FIGHTS*
CLIFFHANGER: *HAPPENS*
CHAPTER: *ENDS*
…Right.
And then, when I actually read the chapter…
KHR 370, VERSION “DISAPPOINTING REALITY”
ADULT!REBORN: *stands around, milkshake bringing all the boys to the yard*
TSUNA: YOU… YOU’RE… WHO ARE YOU.
LAL AND COLONNELLO: OH MY GOD TSUNA, YOU’RE RETARDED.
ADULT!REBORN: I’M NO ONE. I’M A STRANGER. DRAW YOUR OWN CONCLUSIONS.
ADULT!REBORN: Iemitsu you’re a dick imma fight you now. Tsuna, pay attention.
TSUNA: omg.
ADULT!REBORN: Tsuna, lesson one. You were wrong to think you’re better than your father, you suck at fighting, and your dad is a strong man who always gives his all for the sake of his family.
ADULT!REBORN: And lesson two, blah blah dying will means you have to be truly desperate and willing to risk it all or something idk whatever.
ADULT!REBORN: *SHOOTS IEMITSU ALL TO SHIT*
LAL: Holy shit, he targeted the CAROTID ARTERY PRECISELY! I think that means Iemitsu should be dead.
IEMITSU: *FALLS DOWN*
IEMITSU: *GETS UP. IS FINE*
ADULT!REBORN: My work here is done. *changes back to baby form*
TSUNA: REBORN WHERE WERE YOU. WHO WAS THAT MYSTERIOUS FEDORAED MAN. NEVERMIND, DOWN TO BUSINESS.
TSUNA: *blah blah fighting, kerpunched, zero point breakthrough*
CLIFFHANGER: *NOT REALLY FEELING IT?!*
CHAPTER: *ENDS*
CRUEL REALITY. CRUSHED EXPECTATIONS. SANTA CLAUS ISN’T REAL. STAR WARS PREQUELS MOSTLY SUCKED. THE NEW RADIOHEAD ALBUM WAS ONLY SO-SO. THAT COOL NEW THING YOU ORDERED FROM THINKGEEK WAS ONLY MILDLY ENTERTAINING FOR A DAY OR SO AND THEN YOU FORGOT ALL ABOUT IT.
Finally, I calmed down a little and came back to read the chapter with a fresh perspective.
KHR 370, VERSION “WELL ALL RIGHT, YOUR MIND ISN’T BLOWN AND YOUR PANTS ARE STILL ON, BUT IT’S REALLY NOT AS BAD AS YOU FIRST THOUGHT”
FIRST FOUR PAGES: *STILL KIND OF DISAPPOINTING BUT AT LEAST THERE ARE LULZ AND REBORN IS BEING A COMPLETE TROLL WHICH IS ADMITTEDLY ENTERTAINING*
ADULT!REBORN: Iemitsu, in all three versions of this chapter you are still a dick, just FYI. Now Tsuna, pay attention. I’m gonna throw some hard truths at you, but like it or not, this is stuff you will actually need to acknowledge if you’re going to beat your dad.
ADULT!REBORN: Number one, you can’t afford to be so self-righteous that you refuse to admit that you are not, in fact, as powerful or experienced as your father. If you underestimate him and rush in all cocky and arrogant you’re going to lose.
ADULT!REBORN: *KICKS TSUNA IN THE HEAD IN THE MIDDLE OF THIS EXPLANATION FOR NO APPARENT REASON*
ADULT!REBORN: And number two, vague hints about DYING WILL, hint hint, be willing to RISK IT ALL, hint hint hint. You’re my student and we have our special bond so I know you will understand my roundabout cryptic bullshit.
TSUNA: Astonishingly enough, I did understand it, or so it appears!
ADULT!REBORN: Yes, but before I get to that part, I’m going to shoot your dad in the carotid artery I guess, since it’s the next best thing to punching him in the balls.
REBORN: Okay, I’m done.
TSUNA: REBORN WHERE WERE YOU YOU APPEARED OUT OF NOWHERE THERE WAS A GUY IN A SUIT. ON THE SECOND READ-THROUGH MY FAILURE TO OBSERVE ALL THIS IS SOMEHOW LESS ANNOYING AND MORE HILARIOUS.
IEMITSU: Well, Tsuna, did you understand everything the mysterious FEDORA MAN told you?
TSUNA: ACTUALLY, YES. BECAUSE FEDORA MAN IS A MUCH BETTER TEACHER THAN YOU. ANYWAY, YOU’RE STILL A DICK AND I HAVE NO RESPECT FOR YOU BUT OK, FINE, YOU’RE STRONGER THAN ME.
FIGHTING: *HAPPENS*
IEMITSU: HE’S GOTTEN BETTER OMG. BUT—!
TSUNA: *KERPUNCHED* YOU’RE STRONG, FATHER, BUT… I WANT TO DEFEAT YOU!
TSUNA: *SHOUNEN DETERMINATION, ZERO POINT BREAKTHROUGH*
REBORN: Attaboy.
CHAPTER: *ENDS*
Having evaluated this chapter multiple times thus, I’m gonna go ahead and offer my final verdict:
…Not bad.
no subject
But at least someone humiliated Iemitsu a little, and bonus that it was Reborn.
...Although you know he'll go home and Nana will be all, "Oh, poor baby, you have bruises!" and I will have to get serious about my campaign to force Papamoto to just adopt everyone.
Maybe Tsuna didn't recognize Reborn because his hyper!intuition is still exhausted from the workout it got trying to figure out why the hell Daemon Spade was doing his crazy shit. I mean. I'm still tired from that.
Iemitsu had better be unconscious and broken by the end of the next chapter. Seriously that is my one hope for the future. IS THAT BAD?
no subject
I really hope next week will make up for it. The one big saving grace of this chapter, besides the part where Adult Reborn is sex on legs, is that instead of defeating Iemitsu for Tsuna, Reborn put him on the path to doing it himself. Basically, if Iemitsu is trying to teach Tsuna some sort of stupid and unnecessary (not to mention fucked-up, because it undoubtedly is fucked up) lesson, he failed at it utterly, and this chapter showed Reborn going in there and just being ten times the teacher that Iemitsu could ever hope to be, first pointing out what Tsuna is doing wrong, and then actually giving him the clues he needed to fix it. And the more I look back on this chapter, after my initial reaction of ":/", the more I find that I actually really do appreciate that.
And Tsuna is just suffering from a case of plot-induced stupidity, I guess. There is no other explanation that I can bring myself to accept. The powers-that-be behind Tsuna's universe are literally just messing with him. Occasionally, when I read KHR for the purposes of my sanity I just have to put myself in the mindset of "okay, in this series the fourth wall actually is canon." It's a mafia world run by a crazy trolling god and her name is Amano.
Anyway, here's to your one hope for the future, because it is mine as well. TSUNA, BEAT YOUR DAD UP ALREADY. BEAT HIM UP UNTIL HE FINALLY, FINALLY, ACTUALLY FUCKING LISTENS TO YOU, or failing that, just for the love of god, PLEASE JUST PUNCH HIM IN THE BALLS. Someone has to. :|
no subject
But yes, our Juudaime is a little dense sometimes :')
no subject
Totally agree with you about Tsuna giving dad a long-overdue beatdown. Like I said in the reply above, that was the one real saving grace of this chapter--Reborn kicked ass, but he didn't defeat Iemitsu for Tsuna, because at the end of the day, this is Tsuna's fight. This is the one person on possibly the entire planet that he doesn't have to be told or convinced to fight. Like he said himself--he wants to defeat Iemitsu. And he has every right to, and I hope he wins, and like you said, I hope Iemitsu actually feels some goddamn remorse for once in his cheeky life.
And yeah, sometimes Tsuna is just an idiot. I really am starting to find his utter inability to comprehend the fact that REBORN'S TRUE FORM MAY NOT ACTUALLY BE A BABY BUT MAY IN FACT BE THE MANLIEST MAN to be pretty much the funniest thing ever, though.
Maybe if/when he finally sees one of the other Arcos in their transformed state, it'll finally click for him.
no subject
Iemitsu...definitely needs to be beaten around a little for that treatment of Tsuna. Admittedly, now, I think I know why Tsuna is so...backwards on recognizing things and having almost no capacity for thinking. -A- With a father like that, I am not surprised.
As for why he didn't recognize Reborn...maybe he didn't expect the whole thing, but I guess I'm a bit too exhausted to care. :/ Argh. Though, I do admit being disappointed in his thinking skills. Seriously.
no subject
Like I've been saying, in hindsight while I am still a little sad that A!Reborn didn't give Iemitsu more of a beatdown, I am glad that in typical Reborn fashion, he backed down and decided to let Tsuna be the main event. Third time's the charm... here's hoping that next week we will finally, finally get to see Iemitsu reap some of that mighty fine whirlwind he's been sowing. His son is still pretty damn pissed at him, and rightly so.
And I really think it's just that he can't for the life of him wrap his head around the concept that Reborn in any form could possibly ever be anything but a baby. It is just this mental block that he has. Negl, I've come full circle from being like "OH COME ON, AMANO, REALLY" to "OH MY GOD BEST THING EVER." XDDD I don't even know.