makeste | So, now that it's confirmed that Jump is off for the week, we can commence withdrawal.

*joneses*

Or I could try something slightly more productive, like another edition of Recapping Chapters That Came Out Six Years Ago.

I skipped chapter six, in which Kyoko shoots herself, strips down to her underthings and tells off Tsuna's mom, because aside from that there was nothing interesting except for Tsuna nearly being decapitated and my favorite Reborn line ever. Oh, and also this hammer. But that was it, I swear.

Chapter 7, on the other hand, is absolutely non-skippable because it contains the intro of everyone's favorite abuse-magnet, Lambo! |D

1. Today we find Reborn tutoring Tsuna using the "blow him up whenever he makes a mistake" method, which I have to admit has some sound reasoning behind it. How many wrong answers would you give if you got blown up each time? I'll tell you right now that for the vast majority of people, the highest possible answer to that is "one."

Apparently the reason they are studying is because Tsuna wants to pass this test in order to get a raise on his allowance, but on the following page he complains to Reborn that, "At this rate, before my allowance rises, I'll rise to heaven!", which I can only hope is one of those jokes that sounds infinitely better before the translation. Then he makes the absolute sulkiest, most Gokudera-ish expression I have ever seen on his face, and right then is when Lambo makes his appearance.

2. Reborn chooses to entirely ignore the seemingly pertinent fact that a five-year-old boy in cow pajamas is pointing a gun at him, which makes you wonder how fascinating Tsuna's homework really is. Fortunately for him, Lambo used up all his bullets shooting around at random in the park the previous day. I don't know about you, but by this point I am starting to get the strangest feeling that Namimori IS NOT A SAFE PLACE. DO NOT TAKE YOUR CHILDREN TO VISIT THERE.

Lambo then falls from a tree and lands on his ass, leading to the first instance of "To... ler... ate!" D'aww.

3. Then he rings the front doorbell and gets a first-rate glance up Maman's skirt, before sneaking past her and barging into Tsuna's room. Reborn ignores him AGAIN and lays the smackdown on him. Interestingly enough, the most that Tsuna, boy wonder of compassion, can muster up in response to this unmitigated abuse of a small child is a politely concerned, "How dreadful!" Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the future savior of humankind.

Lambo then formally introduces himself in the most ridiculous way possible, and Tsuna continues his streak of why-me-and-also-I-just-don't-give-a-shit faces. He's really on a roll this chapter.

4. I swear this has got to be like the single most awkward chapter in the history of the manga. Now even Tsuna is purposely trying to ignore Lambo, who takes their blatant rudeness like a man and starts babbling about souvenirs he brought from Italy. When that too fails to attract attention, he whips out the ten year bazooka instead! Then he puts it away like a tease and pulls out a hand grenade. And for some reason, that's the thing that finally gets Tsuna to react, despite the fact that Reborn JUST BLEW HIM UP not six pages ago.

5. Reborn blows up Lambo too because that's what Reborns do best, and then finally explains that he actually has no idea who Lambo is, but it doesn't matter because the Bovino family is kind of lame and he doesn't associate with lower-ranking families, bitch please. Tsuna is totally impressed, or possibly just relieved that he finally found someone whom Reborn has even more contempt for than him.

FORTUNATELY Tsuna's mom at least has some sense of human decency, so she brings Lambo back and tells Tsuna to sort out the apparent dispute between the feuding young'uns. Once again, Tsuna is a total douchenozzle and cares more about the fact that Lambo is getting snot on his clothes than the fact that clearly this is a traumatized AND COMPLETELY DISTURBED IN SO MANY WAYS!! child who just got blown up with a hand grenade.

6. So eventually Tsuna takes Lambo outside and gives him some candy and Lambo starts pouring his heart out to him and telling him all about his dream to be the boss of the Bovino family and make all humanity bow down to him. Yet again, Tsuna is contemptuous, which frankly is bullshit because I seem to recall that SOMEONE wanted to be a ROBOT when they were Lambo's age, Tsuna. AHEM.

Lambo explains that his boss told him to assassinate Reborn, who he really did meet in a bar (because little kids are always hooking up in bars). Apparently they really hit it off, which can mostly be attributed to the fact that Reborn was asleep at the time. Anyway, since Lambo's finally stopped crying, Tsuna takes him home and sulks some more because his mom chose to invite Lambo to dinner rather than tossing him out onto the street.

7. Lambo is behaving admirably for once in his life, so naturally Tsuna shrieks at Reborn to DO SOMETHING because "I CAN'T HANDLE HIM!" Okaaaay. So Reborn stabs Lambo in the face and Lambo, having finally had enough, shoots himself with the ten year bazooka AT LAST.

A handsome guy appears! Seriously, TYL!Lambo is easily the most attractive guy to appear in the manga thus far, and that's including Yamamoto and Gokudera since Amano hadn't yet figured out how to draw them at this point. He thanks Tsuna for taking care of him ten years ago, then explains that he's the 15-year-old version of the little kid they were all torturing a couple minutes ago. The mechanics of the ten year bazooka are explained, and Tsuna is all WHAAAAA NO WAY! Just you wait, Tsuna. You ain't seen nothing yet.

8. Despite the fact that Lambo is now older, well-spoken, and a little bit gorgeous, Reborn continues to ignore him, prompting Lambo to stick a couple of cow horns on his head. (I know that's what I always do when I want someone to take me seriously.) He then charges up the horns with one million volts, which is just SLIGHTLY MORE INTIMIDATING, holy shit.

Then he charges at Reborn and gets stabbed in the head with a fork. ...

9. After Lambo runs away crying (which is absolutely the reasonable thing to do in that situation), Maman returns with the five-year-old version back in tow. Lambo promptly gets himself blown up AGAIN, because Amano just wasn't sure yet if we had picked up on the fact that THIS CHARACTER WAS MADE FOR ABUSE. As a matter of fact, we had.

10. And the rest of the chapter is filled with omakes like FIND THE REAL REBORN and FIND THE REAL LAMBO and ONE OF AMANO'S STAFF MAY OR MAY NOT BE RELATED TO SHITT P! The end.

So what has this chapter taught us? Well, I'm pretty sure the lessons I'll take home are a) if you get yourself blown up in this series no one will hear your screams, and b) so that's why the Fourth boss fought with a fork.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

b) so that's why the Fourth boss fought with a fork.
Summary of ALL Summaries <3

Heh. |D

Seriously, though, this chapter showed us what a fork can REALLY do.

I re-read chapters 65-70 yesterday...

BUT YES. I completely forgot about that Reborn line with the police station being covered in blood. LAMBOOO
I love your links..I should read these chapters too, but no time!

Ooh, the Kokuyo Arc. I'm planning to reread that at some point too (it's amazing how much I've forgotten about it). XD

I love how he says it so casually, too. Heh. AND POOR LAMBO. His life is pain.

Yet again, Tsuna is contemptuous, which frankly is bullshit because I seem to recall that SOMEONE wanted to be a ROBOT when they were Lambo's age, Tsuna. AHEM.

I love you. Totally choked on my tea right there.

so that's why the Fourth boss fought with a fork.

Makes you wonder why subsequent bosses didn't use it, too, seeing that it's ~~super~~ so effective.

Yep, Tsuna is pretty much the last person who should be judgmental of someone else's ridiculous childhood dreams. XD

I KNOW. Maybe they couldn't figure out the proper technique.

Chapter 6 was really great because Kyoko shot herself in the head. I can see why she's Ryohei's little sis now. And that line was awesome. The telling off Tsuna's mom thing was not cool though D8

It really is amazing what character development can do. I mean damn Tsuna.

Adult!Lambo is really hot<3 And Reborn don't take no shit from no body.

so that's why the Fourth boss fought with a fork.
Goodness it makes so much SENSE now. Wow.

Well, in Kyoko's defense, she was telling Maman off for insulting her son for no good reason (although considering Tsuna's behavior in the next chapter, MAYBE SHE DID HAVE GOOD REASON), so it's fair. BUT YES, the Sasagawa genes are clearly stronger in her than they appear to be at first glance.

It's really kind of sad when you apparently have to learn responsibility and compassion from, well, Reborn. XD BUT HE MUST HAVE, because by the time the Kokuyo Arc rolls around he really has changed.

He might still be a failure, but at least he's an attractive failure. And yeah, you'd better not ever interrupt Reborn's meals and/or tutoring sessions if you value your life. LESSON LEARNED.

FOR REALS. And decades later, the secrets of his success were passed down to Vongola's number one hitman.

LOL but making her foam at the mouth was...much. But there's not much you can do if you're in dying will mode. And yes, her extreme genes need to be shown more often!

Pffft, responsibility maybe but compassion from Reborn? But it has worked wonders 8o Thankfully, too.

Indeed 8D. It's times like these when I wonder when puberty starts for this kid XD Or what he'll look like in 5 years instead of 10.

Imagine it's pasted to Yama next =x Or his son or something. Or what if Aria used/uses forks?!
/shot

I forgot how cool Kyoko actually is, since we never see her. :( But she's going to be the coolest boss' wife ever. If anyone tried to kill her she'd probably just shoot them and go back to whatever she was doing.

And dammit, you talking about the Ten Year Bazooka made me go look up the bit where 20YL!Lambo said "Such nostalgic faces . . ." and now I'm crying. ;_; WE'RE IN THE DAILY LIFE CHAPTERS, THIS SHOULD NOT HAPPEN.

One million volts? Holy shit, TYL Lambo is hardcore. o.0

b) so that's why the Fourth boss fought with a fork.

It makes you wonder why no-one else ever uses them. I mean, you'd think there'd be a Varia member or something.

The anime doesn't help much with that part either, since whenever she shows up there she is invariably either cooking or knitting. 8| (I've been catching up on the Future arc episodes and CAN YOU TELL THIS HAS BEEN ANNOYING ME A BIT?) But yeah, seeing her manhandle Tsuna's mom really makes you take another look at her. XD

S-sob 20YL!Lambo is the comedic combo breaker; the younger two versions are all about the lulz, and then he shows up and just DEPRESSES EVERYONE. And the worst part is, I'm not even sure if I should be hoping his universe got undone by Tsuna's actions at the end of the Future arc, because if it did then does that mean he no longer exists or what? THAT WOULD BE HORRIBLE.

Yeah, really. That is terrifying.

The lack of variety among mafia weapons is a little bit disappointing. Everyone's all about the guns and the boxes; no one ever thinks to try a fork or a trident or an iron maiden or something. I miss the good old days when Cloudy Primo went around kicking ass with a pair of handcuffs.

I like to think think 20YL!Lambo might have come from a slightly different future where they were all actually dead. Which would neatly make the different TYLs into separate universes and everybody's okay.

Although I do with Shouichi would show up again and explain things. And, y'know, mess around with time and space. :D

I actually really like the guns, even if they take away some of the awesome that came with the improbable weapons. It feels a bit more . . . mafia-ish, which is a big selling point for me. ;) Although I do really really like the fact that the Second Boss just covered his hands with Dying Will Flame and (apparently) ripped people to bits or something.

Poor Lambo--almost 300 chapters, and he'd still the official punching bag of the manga!

And someone needs to use that Reborn line in a fic ~~hinthint~~

It'll probably never change, sadly enough. Role of the Thunder Guardian and all that. XD

It does deserve a proper tribute, but it would take some mad skills to pull it off. A LINE THAT GOOD, YOU DON'T JUST MESS AROUND WITH.

So, now that it's confirmed that Jump is off for the week, we can commence withdrawal.

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